i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Randomize
