this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
