but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
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