once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
She made me pour olive oil on her.
Randomize
