9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize
