she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
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