i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
Don't tell me you're on acid again
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
Randomize
