No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
I was so drunk I accidentally put in two tampons.
I tried to talk you out of it. You were worried about alcohol being a blood thinner.
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
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Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
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also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
mid-sex she goes "oh my god. you aren't even going to remember my name in the morning, are you?". And i was so wasted that i straight up told her "honestly, I don't even remember your name right now"
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