Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
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