So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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