Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
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