when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
Randomize
