Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
25 People Admit the Worst Things They’ve Done for Good Reasons
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
25 Things All Men Can Definitely Agree On
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.