Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (408): View more from California

  Where is the hickey?

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  (408): Where is the hickey? http://tfl.nu/scjm
  Replies (4) Good night (1147) Bad night (552)
• Favorite

  (469): View more from Texas

  HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...

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  (469): HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers... http://tfl.nu/21iq
  Replies (12) Good night (830) Bad night (3095)
• Favorite

  (813): View more from Florida

  he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach

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  (813): he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach http://tfl.nu/e6go
  Replies (25) Good night (3118) Bad night (2882)
• Favorite

  (970): View more from Colorado

  just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....

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  (970): just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address.... http://tfl.nu/ivpp
  Replies (28) Good night (6392) Bad night (2163)
• Favorite

  (925): View more from California

  I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.

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  (925): I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point. http://tfl.nu/b8y5
  Replies (48) Good night (1480) Bad night (5411)
• Favorite

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night

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  (978): My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night http://tfl.nu/zzxc
  Replies (10) Good night (4664) Bad night (1101)
• Favorite

  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates

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  (484): scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates http://tfl.nu/oxez
  Replies (12) Good night (7368) Bad night (1294)
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!

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  (847): looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again! http://tfl.nu/gkwb
  Replies (1) Good night (1754) Bad night (704)
• Favorite

  (641): View more from Iowa

  He smells so good today

  (1-641): View more from Iowa

  Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.

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  (641): He smells so good today (1-641): Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit. http://tfl.nu/5jte
  Replies (13) Good night (2234) Bad night (813)
• Favorite

  (850): View more from Florida

  Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.

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  (850): Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made. http://tfl.nu/7051
  Replies (5) Good night (1956) Bad night (616)
• Favorite

  (228): View more from Mississippi

  Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?

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  (228): Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know? http://tfl.nu/qpy1
  Replies (10) Good night (1915) Bad night (649)
• Favorite

  (651): View more from Minnesota

  Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.

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  (651): Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen. http://tfl.nu/o1qk
  Replies (2) Good night (478) Bad night (910)
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"

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  (248): Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum" http://tfl.nu/5h4q
  Replies (5) Good night (703) Bad night (401)
• Favorite

  (425): View more from Washington

  I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.

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  (425): I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis. http://tfl.nu/1o6v
  Replies (2) Good night (748) Bad night (392)
• Favorite

  (903): View more from Texas

  The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night

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  (903): The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night http://tfl.nu/e4l5
  Replies (4) Good night (570) Bad night (282)

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