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• (720): View more from Colorado

  The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.

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• (602): View more from Arizona

  I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?

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• (214): View more from Texas

  Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.

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• (701): View more from North Dakota

  That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.

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  If You’re Hot, It’s Easier For You To Do These 27 Things

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (205): View more from Alabama

  Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.

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• (847): View more from Illinois

  He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.

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• (830): View more from Texas

  Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.

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• (337): View more from Louisiana

  Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.

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• (505): View more from New Mexico

  He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.

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  23 Struggles Kids These Days Will Never Know

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?

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• (603): View more from New Hampshire

  I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.

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• (515): View more from Iowa

  He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?

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• (587): View more from Alberta

  The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am

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• (614): View more from Ohio

  I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.

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• (908): View more from New Jersey

  We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one

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