Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (816): View more from Missouri

  dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?

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  (816): dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink? http://tfl.nu/aysx
  Replies (2) Good night (642) Bad night (1014)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked

  (708): View more from Illinois

  so?

  (630): View more from Illinois

  then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas

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  (630): after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked (708): so? (630): then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas http://tfl.nu/17ue
  Replies (18) Good night (4607) Bad night (689)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week

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  (303): I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week http://tfl.nu/iwzc
  Replies (69) Good night (7621) Bad night (3001)
• Favorite

  (786): View more from Florida

  He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way

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  (786): He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way http://tfl.nu/nq2f
  Replies (26) Good night (5714) Bad night (1614)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin

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  (203): Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin http://tfl.nu/pqe0
  Replies (26) Good night (5199) Bad night (1258)
• Favorite

  (339): View more from Massachusetts

  I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette

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  (339): I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette http://tfl.nu/67ko
  Replies (22) Good night (6077) Bad night (1612)
• Favorite

  (716): View more from New York

  i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.

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  (716): i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody. http://tfl.nu/l0aj
  Replies (7) Good night (3346) Bad night (831)
• Favorite

  (262): View more from Wisconsin

  You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.

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  (262): You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk. http://tfl.nu/u9t6
  Replies (7) Good night (4381) Bad night (811)
• Favorite

  (216): View more from Ohio

  what is it with giant penises always finding me

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  (216): what is it with giant penises always finding me http://tfl.nu/ji8j
  Replies (26) Good night (4253) Bad night (974)
• Favorite

  (509): View more from Washington

  I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg

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  (509): I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg http://tfl.nu/tr8k
  Replies (6) Good night (2302) Bad night (867)
• Favorite

  (770): View more from Georgia

  he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.

  (352): View more from Florida

  teach me your ways.

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  (770): he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it. (352): teach me your ways. http://tfl.nu/5pat
  Replies (6) Good night (3046) Bad night (881)
• Favorite

  (760): View more from California

  She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.

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  (760): She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid. http://tfl.nu/c9kh
  Replies (3) Good night (600) Bad night (1406)
• Favorite

  (208): View more from Idaho

  Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?

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  (208): Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow? http://tfl.nu/sft8
  Replies (3) Good night (775) Bad night (390)
• Favorite

  (206): View more from Washington

  Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed

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  (206): Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed http://tfl.nu/3k2a
  Replies (10) Good night (798) Bad night (499)
• Favorite

  (727): View more from Florida

  So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.

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  (727): So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink. http://tfl.nu/ln3w
  Replies (4) Good night (760) Bad night (359)

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