you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize