You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Randomize
