Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
i can't believe i had my finger in that
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
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