No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
Randomize
