Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
Randomize