Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
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