i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
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