For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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