i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
Randomize