PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
Randomize
