I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Randomize
