hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
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