"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
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