Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
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