found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
Tip for today: never try to fart and swallow at the same time. You'll end up choking on whatever you are currently swallowing and shit yourself from the freakout of choking.
You were so high at Ikea last night that you were convinced you could speak Swedish. The whole the time you were our navigator and when we got to the cashier you were hitting on the lady. When she gave you her number you told her you were saving her number as Inglfurfta cuaue she must be swedish since she works there.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
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