Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
Oh god it's open bar.
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
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