paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
I have so many feelings about this burrito
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
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