I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
Why are your pants in the freezer?
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
Randomize
