he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Randomize