Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
our cab driver is having phone sex.
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
