Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
We talked him into tasing himself.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Randomize
