Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
Randomize
