and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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