Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
And then he peed in my hair
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