After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
25 Of The Most Cringeworthy Internet Stalking Fails
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
21 People Who Barely Escaped Death
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?