remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
Randomize
