your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
i think i have herpe
just one?
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
there is puke in my bra ... again
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
