thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
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