is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
