Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
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Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
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I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
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