I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
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