she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
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