is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
