I cockslap morals
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize