My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
Sorry dude, one minute I was flirting with a bachelorette party from Dallas and the next I’m being tied to the bed by the bride
Trying to wrangle us an invite to the wedding
Randomize
