i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
Do vagina's smell?
Went to the doctors. She saw my " I love beer" tattoo. All she said was " My drunken tat is of just one word. "Cornnuts.". Then said Mexico was "awesome." And sent me on my way. Yeah. She's my favorite doctor.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
